Introducing....

Our new Eagle belt holder!! Today was Taekwondo testing for Ethan. He did great!! He went up another entire belt this summer alone. It is amazing how fast he is progressing. Honestly, in about 18 more months, he will be a first degree black belt!! YIKES.



I love this sight - all the Black Belts' bags lined up perfectly around the edges of the mat... Just calls to my anal nature!!

I love *home* days

It is a home day today. Just doing laundry and cooking. I have a huge pot of Bolognese sauce on the stove, bubbling away. My house smells delectable!! It reminds me of being in my grandmother's house. My favourite days were when I would come home from school and smell sauce cooking or pizza baking... My grandmother was an amazing cook. But I really did not appreciate it when I was a kid. I wanted "white" food - like my friends had. I wanted peanut butter and jelly sandwiches; or grilled cheese; or hot dogs... But I got boconccini and tomoatoe salad, and spaghetti and meatballs, and pizza a la margherita.... Today, I would KILL for these things!! So I am carrying on the tradition. I was taught how to make sauce by the master, and I am trying my best to keep it going. If y'all wanna come for dinner tonight, we are having gnocchi with Bolognese sauce!! Mmmmmm.....

[21] days 20 and 21

It is done.

This challenge has not been an easy one... I really am not a very patient person - not with my children; not with anyone... I have a lot of growing to do. But I recognize that. That is the first step. Time to take a break from "challenges" for a while.

Have a good day all!!

Sunday Ramblings

I am pleased to say that I have nothing to say!! And I can't tell you how much of a relief it is to have nothing to say!! I had a crappy week at work - just really made me stop and think about what I am doing in life, and is it all really worth it. Coming to the conclusion that it isn't, and so I see changes in the very near future. Good. Done with that. My kiddies are fine. Getting ready for school in a few weeks. All is well. Good. Marc is plugging along and our school is going gang busters. Relief. A few weeks back we were honestly planning a shut down route - what to do with tuitions and notice for teachers, etc. But just as it seemed bleak, all Marc's hard work from the past few months paid off, and now it is full steam ahead. Good again. Tomorrow I have the carpet cleaners coming. I am WAY excited about that!! Make my carpets look brand new again - because they are 8 months old now and not "new" anymore!! hee hee Ethan has taekwondo testing on Wednesday for his eagle belt. Marc has next Friday off so we are going to do some more work on the front garden. I need a few more loads of bark mulch brought in and to move some plants. They are not fairing well where they are situated now. It will look all that much better when we are done. It's all good.

Ciao y'all!!

[21] days 17, 18 and 19

[21] day 16

I can't do it....

Okay, I have made a break through. I CANNOT run a casual house!! Not possible. I have been working all week. My final contract of the summer!! Yeah. My wonderful sitter is back, but she cannot control the house and at the end of the day when I come home, I am exhausted and disgusted at the state of my house. So I clean. I clean while still in my business clothes. I clean before I get the children dinner. I clean after dinner. I clean into the night... I had planned to hire a nanny come the fall so that I could give more time to the firm and really get things going. No. I can't stand people in my house. I can't stand being away and not having the control. I am so disgusted that I have hired a carpet cleaning company to come in Monday morning and do the entire house. I seriously need some professional psychiatric help!! But I can't do it. I am thrilled school is starting again in a few weeks. I am thrilled that my house will be empty and clean. Sad. I know. But I can't live/function any other way.

[21] day 15

I *love* the theatre...

I saw the Phantom of the Opera, and absolutely loved it!! I also loved physically being at the theatre. I felt more grown-up; more cultured just standing in the lobby, knowing I belonged there for the time being!! And the production itself - amazing!! The singer/actor who played the Phantom was phenomenal - his name is John Cudia. His voice was soul piercing - it gave me goose bumps. He received three standing ovations at the end of the performance. Deservedly so!! Now, I am NOT an "opera" gal. I generally do not appreciate the work/dedication/utter talent it takes to be able to perform like this. But now I do!! It is humbling. I would like to attend more events like this. It is a bit addicting. Now I want to know what else is coming to "town"!!

Dream re-ignited

Last night we went to our friends', the Engens, farm for a BBQ. I fell in love all over again. Imagine 6 or 7 acres with two barns, 3 horses, a huge (and really cute!!) chicken coop, white picket fences, huge manicured lawns, and a house that rivals any fancy farmhouse that I have ever seen - Martha Stewart move over!! Absolutely stunning. They bought the farm over 5 years ago now, and it has basically doubled in value. I just *love* being out there - no one around you; room to move and breathe; quiet.... There were easily 50+ people there, and it felt like 10 - so much room to move around... So I have to thank Tonya and Eden for re-igniting my passion to own a piece of property like this. I know of one for sale now - 5 acres in South Langely, going for $700,000 - but the barn needs to be torn down and the house needs too much restoration. Not a project I can take on at this time. No wonder the price is "good"... But one day. I will get there. Now I am not keen on the aminal part of the farm - I will have to work around this somehow... My mom is praying that she will live long enough to see the day that I (Miss Don't Put Your Sticky Dirty Fingers On My Wall And Make Me Have To Follow You Around With A Wet Cloth At All Times) run a "farm". Greenhouses are something to look into!! As long as I make $3000 a year in "profit", I can run a hobby farm. Doesn't have to be animal related!! Hmmm - I think I may have come up with a way around the stinky, dirty animals!! Woohooo!! Nevertheless, I want a farm. Move over universe - I have made a decision!!

[21] day 14

 

Blast from the past!

I found this picture while going through my photo directories this morning. This was taken on my sister's wedding day - 8 yrs ago!! Wow!! We look so young... And thin... Sigh. I don't know where the time has gone!! 

[21] day 12 and 13

New Real Estate Dream

I want to live here...


In San Remo....

On the Mediterranean.....

Only $5.5 mil US.....

[21] day 11

How Rude

I heard the phone ring very early this morning. I did not answer it. I KNEW it was the firm. Sure enough, after looking at the call display - it was! Our office manager is away again, and I know the head partner is calling me in. Even though I said I was not coming in today because I don't have any one to watch my kiddies, and Monday I will be in again for the week... And he called anyway. And now I just received two very RUDE emails asking me to "get a schedule together" for him!! What??? Obviously I don't speak English when I talk because I thought my "schedule" was pretty clear!! Ummmm - NO working for the summer (which is a joke considering I have worked 4 full weeks already....) and then back in September when my children go to school and I can commit my time to the firm!!! It makes me soooo mad to know that I am not respected enough to be listened to when I speak, AND for him to remember what I have said!! So of course my email back was equally curt... Probably should not have done that. Probably should have been nicer....

I am just really struggling to figure out why I am putting up with this. The money is not it. Do I like the "freedom"? I only will work 2 days a week from 9 am to 2 pm. I get to bring Ethan to school and pick him up from school. Isabella goes to my private sitter who lives down the street from Ethan's school. It is very handy. But couldn't I find this kind of committment at another firm?? Maybe one much closer to home?? The care for the children is already in place.... I have to travel 40 minutes to get to work each way now. It would be fantastic to find this in Surrey or Langley, instead of having to go to New West. Maybe that is WHY I put up with it. Because it is already in place and I don't have to put myself out there. I do a very peculiar job now - I buy and sell cabs. It is corporate based work, but specialized. Not many other firms do this - out here. Downtown Vancouver is another story, but I am NEVER going back there!! Argh. So now I am trying to not let this spoil my day. Already, though, I can feel the anxiety building in me for what awaits me Monday morning when I walk through those doors. WHY do people have to be sooo rude????

Helpless....

That is how I feel right now. Totally helpless. My cousin Angelo was in a fatal car crash in Italy on Sunday. He was driving his girlfriend back to her home town in the late afternoon. They stopped at a McDonald's and had lunch. Then they started on their way again. Valentina said Angelo double over the steering wheel and said his stomach was killing him, took off his seatbelt, and then they crashed head on with a car carrying 4 guys from Napoli. The driver of the other car died on impact. Valentina has a broken arm and minor internal injuries. Angelo was sent to Rome and is in their equivalent of intensive care. His legs are shattered; his arms are shattered; they are unsure if he has internal injuries at this time... I am at a loss. I feel sick at what has happened, and what is going to happen. All I can think of is our laws here in Canada - what would be happening if this occurred here. How Angelo would be charged with manslaughter for the death, accidental as it was, of the other driver... How Valentina would have to sue Angelo in order to get her medical and rehab covered... How the 3 other guys in the other car would have to sue Angelo for their expenses.... My head is swimming!! And Angelo is the most sensitive spirit you could ever meet. He will have to carry this with him forever, and I honestly don't know if he is spiritually strong enough to over come this... And the rehab he is going to have to endure over these next months!! Sick. I am sick. And yet oh so very grateful that his life was spared. I don't know what I would do without him on this earth. Even though he is half a world away from me, I take comfort in knowing he is there. I loved him from the very first moment I met him when he was 3 yrs old and I was 10. That was the first time we went to Italy. He was my constant companion for a month. And has remained so ever since. And I cannot even begin to imagine the pain that my aunt and uncle are in!! It is like a scene from a bad movie. I want to turn it off, but I can't. So now I sit and wait to hear more news. They are 9 hrs ahead of us. Hopefully by lunch time one of my aunts or uncles will have called with an update.

[21] day 10

This one is for Angelo. Ti amo caro!!

Isabella and the firm don't mix

Well, here she is.... This looks good. IRL it looks as though she had been in a fight and lost!! She won't be coming back to the firm any time soon. If ever..... Poor little thing! 

[21] day 9

*LOVE* this kid

This is my sweet niece Emelia. I could just eat her up!! This was taken yesterday at a family bbq out in White Rock. She is full of smiles and energy, and a little bit of mischief too!! Watch out world - here she comes!!

[21] day 8

[21] day 7

My kiddies

They are crazy....

But I love 'em soooo!!!!!

Saturday Ramblings

Well, this going carb free and sugar free is proving to be much harder than I ever imagined. Good thing I have never smoked or drank in my life. I cannot imagine being addicted to these things, because obviously I am addicted to sugar and I am seriously going through withdrawl. I had the biggest headache last night. And today I physically feel "fluish". How odd.... It is amazing what the body gets used to and then "needs" to survive. Oh well. Get over it. I have many thousands of dollars, literally, of clothing in my closet that does not fit me anymore. These cannot be replaced - well, not without Marc divorcing me!! So food/bad habits have to be replaced. Much cheaper in the end, wouldn't you agree?!

But do you know what I have found? I don't like "cheerleaders". I feel that people are patronizing me. Isn't that strange that I see it in this light... I have to tell you, I seem to attract only those people who need things from me. It has been like this my entire life. So I always keep quiet when someone asks me, for example, what I do for a living. If I say law then suddenly they are at my doorstep looking for free legal advice or asking me to prepare their wills or write a nasty letter to someone, etc. I don't know why people think it is okay to impose on others without offering compensation? So I have stopped telling people what I do. And stopped telling people what I am doing. I am pretty quiet, most of the time. Because of this, people think I am a snob. That is the first thing I always hear - "Gee, before I got to know you, I thought you were a snob!". Nice.... Now y'all know I am going sugar/carb free, but my family doesn't. And Marc's family doesn't. And I really don't plan on advertising it anymore. (Hence why I have my blog!! My family does not know it exists. Only friends visit. I am okay with that). And when the weight begins to come off, and people ask, I don't know what I will tell them. My sister is the only one in my family who is supportive without ever wanting anything in return. And I am that for her. It is hard to explain. My family is super negative/pessimistic. Gee, wonder where I get it?? Really. They are all quit whining and get to work people. Look where they came from? They all left Italy and came here with nothing in their pockets and made a life - a very very good life - for themselves. So I am never allowed to complain or whine about anything - especially my children!! Hard to always keep it in... Anyway - I do have many friends who respect me and don't ever impose on me!! You all know who you are!!! HUGS HUGS HUGS But I guess this next week is going to be a long one for me. Again - sorry in advance for seeming "*itchy". I blame it on the sugar!!!

But on to more fun things. I am going shopping now. For the kids. Isabella begins pre-school in a few weeks - yeah - and she needs inside slippers and a snack bag. Ethan is going into grade 2 and he needs a new backpack and runners. They both need clothing, but I don't go overboard there. I just start out with a few pairs of jeans/cargos and a few new tshirts and then as the weather gets colder, I buy more. By November they tend to be all stocked up. I love this time of the year. I love getting organized for another school year. I am also getting my house spruced up. I want to paint, and Marc does not have the time. I am hiring a painter to do accent walls in the formal living room and the great room and then paint our master bedroom and bathroom and the spare bedroom. I have decided on a really rich chocolate brown and apple green. The green is going to be used in the great room and the 4th bedroom, and the chocolate is going to be used everywhere else. I have said it before, and I will say it again - OCD is bad for the budget!!

Ciao y'all.

[21] day 6

[21] day 5

Rhonna's day five quote really did not go with my theme. So I took from it the idea of being awake in order to make something happen. As long as my eyes are open, I can see what is going on. I can't deny that I am impatient. I can't deny that I am short tempered. These things have to change.


I find that I have been on edge much more in these past five days. I don't really like having to re-evaluate myself over and over again... Nor do I like having to stop and count to ten before I answer when I feel I am getting angry... Change is hard. That is annoying.

On a happier note, I was reading my lovely friend Mary's blog and she has just returned from a trip to Italy. It was hilarious listening to her recount her adventures, from a "westerner's" point of view!! I felt like she was describing members of my personal family... Italian culture - REAL Italian culture - is an experience!! It is intoxicating. It is fresh. It is alive. And we just don't get it here in North America. There is a passion and zest for life and love that just does not translate here. It is something you want to hold on to forever... And I can't wait to go back next summer!! Thank you Mary for re-kindling my passion for my home land!! I am counting the days until we leave.

[21] Day 4

Well, today my patience is being tested on all levels - not just with the children!! Have to say, it is much easier keeping my patience with the kids than it is with the "adults" I have dealt with today!! Wow. I really don't know how people were raised... Doesn't anyone practice common decency anymore?? Shocking.

[21] Day 3

[21] - Day 2

[21] - Cover and Day One

So this journal is dedicated to PATIENCE - or rather, my lack of it... I have decided to do it in a 6x8 size and keep it super super simple. I find that if I don't fuss, I can keep the committment to do the journal and that is a good thing.

Day one - why I am impatient. I come by it totally naturally. I was raised in a house where when things were wanted, it was NOW. And there was no patience for learning. It was do it right the first time, or don't do it at all. I was literally expected to know how to do everything. And I was supposed to do it perfectly. No pressure.... Sadly, I have brought this philosophy to my parenting ways now, and that is not right. I cannot expect my children to do their best when I don't allow them to do THEIR best. Not MY best. "Forget past mistakes. Forget present mistakes. Forget everything except what you are doing and do it now".

Part Three

Well, here I go again. Rhonna is running the (21) day challenge again, and I have taken it up - again! This is round 3 for me. Are they helping me? Yes, I can honestly say that they are. It is good to look back and go over what I wrote down and look at the quotes and see if I am doing better. Very helpful. Also makes me accountable. That is a good thing. So this round is dedicated to PATIENCE. Or rather my lack of it. Especially with the children. This is something I really have to change. I can make grown men cry when I get impatient. I can only imagine what it does to my children... So, it time to lower my voice and take deep breaths and learn some patience.

Night all!

*I will answer to "Her Majesty"*

Yes, please, from now on, call me the Queen of Lawn Darts!! You heard me right!! I have found a new talent. I can play lawn darts. And I am good at it!! I mean really good!! Who knew that I had such passion for a game that is generally reserved for those over the respectable age of 70?!! Marc's parents had a lawn dart set out at Harrison, and they said they had taught Ethan to play the night before. So I thought I would try. Hey, if my 7 yr old can learn, so can I! Well, I started playing, and I kept getting the dart in the ring! Then Marc decided that it MUST be just a fluke that I could get that dart in there over and over again (generally, I have NO hand eye coordination), so he challenged me to a game. First one to 20 points. Ummm - who skunked him??!! Oh ya, ME!! I won two games in a row - 20 to 9 and 20 to 11. And the last game, I needed the 2 point shot to win. And I got it! Y'all don't understand how thrilled I am about this. I have NEVER beat Marc in any game in our entire lives together! No joke. He is the game master - board games; card games; video games; ping pong; tennis; you name it!! But now, I reign supreme as the Lawn Dart Queen. Thank you!!!!

And just like that

Another week has come to an end!! But not just ANY week - my last week at work, well, for at least the next two weeks! I applaud all you full time working moms. The job never ends. You work all day and then come home to work all night. It is exhausting. I did not remember how tiring it was. I used to work, part time, when Ethan was little. Up until he was 3. Then I quit. I could not stomach law anymore. And now I have been working again, part time, since January. But it is very different when everyone leaves the house in the morning, and then everyone comes home after school. There is no one in the house to mess it up! THAT causes me more stress than working!! But I am grateful for these contracts that I pick up here and there. Keeps my head in the game and gives us extra $$. Something that always seems to be needed....

So this past week I learned many "new" things. I learned how to do a conveyance from scratch. NOT my favourite. Won't be doing it again for a while. I also learned how to write a proper Purchase and Sale Agreement for buying and selling cabs. I will be using that one a lot. And I learned how to restore a Society. That was intense. And it is no where near complete. At least I have to say that my "job" is never boring. I am thankful for that too. Otherwise, I wouldn't still be here. Still doing all of this. The rewards aren't that great!! Money only goes so far.

What else to say?? Ethan has gone camping with the in-laws to Harrison. He was sooo thrilled to go. And he was even more thrilled that he was going to get his own tent to sleep in - on his own! My in-laws have this huge deluxe camper. But Ethan wants to "rough" it. Soooo not my kid!! Whatever floats his boat. We are going up to retrieve him tomorrow. It will be nice to go to the lake and sit and soak up the sun and do nothing else. Looking forward to that. Oh ya - and I miss having Ethan around!! He is really good at occupying Isabella!! hee hee

I am off to watch a movie with hubby and veg. I don't want to think anymore. Ciao y'all!!